What other people think about you is not of your business

2 min reading

Quick summary:

Reading Time: 2 minutes

(Read with a pinch of salt…)

– I know completely nothing about what you do, but apparently you achieved a great success.

– No way! I just do well what I do. It’s not really success.

– Well, I heard your opinion counts a lot in the industry.

– Please! It matters! Maybe for half of the industry, i.e. clients. Because the second half hates me.

– There you go! I told you you’re successful! If they hate you, this means the success is great. If they hate a lot, this means they are scared and jealous. So… Congratulations. How did you do it?

At the beginning some things seem silly. Like this dialogue. But… for some reasons I thought about it for long enough until it started to make sense to me.

Personally, I believe in more positive emotions. I also believe that people are inherently good and they care more for success rather than failure. But my faith is one, reality – is the other.

The latter sometimes screeches: one cannot only have admirers and friends. But maybe that’s just as well. Apparently, our enemies make us who we are. However, my friend and mentor, Piotr Voelkel says: “stroking and praise only makes you fat and lazy. It’s the crisis and enemies that grow and add your wings”.

Maybe enemy is too strong a word. Just as hate. So if I abuse it, it’s definitely being aware of exaggeration. But the fact is that not everyone must agree with us, respect our opinions or appreciate our work.
And this is normal.

One needs to find some sense in the fact that the world is not in love with us!

I dedicate this dialogue to all who, like me, sometimes worry too much about other people’s opinion about themselves.
What other people think about you is none of your business – my mantra for the days when uninvited opinion pulls me back to the ground a bit too hard.

P.S. After reading all this Marta, who helps me with the blog, said that it is all true, but may be received badly by others. Especially if they don’t know me. And that I should think whether I definitely want to publish it – “there will be hate, if not in comments, then internal hate.”

So I considered her smart suggestion to let go – I did not want to risk it that someone would not understand my intentions again. But I thought that letting go would be contrary to everything I wrote here. I would be a complete hypocrite. I prefer hate – internal or external – than the feeling of shame when I look into the mirror.

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